Words written on: February 7, 2010

Testing 4 5 6.

Words written on: March 16, 2009

I am contradicting myself a lot these days, but what the hack! haha
Well, i was too lazy to transcript the other songs, soo.. yeah! haha

But, today's course was quite interesting.
Success = Overcoming our fears. 0.o

That made me wonder about a lot of stuff, that was why some of you guys would have seen me thinking (according to you guys EMO-ing) when the coach was talking about fear.

I was thinking a lot.. a lot of shitz.

First of, it was what i was afraid of, my fears.
My top 4 fears are... *drum roll please!*

1. Fear of ____________________ (_____)
2. Fear of not being able to.. to.. to.. shit whats that word... to... let go of my past and let it be my experience.
3. Fear of not being able to express myself
4. Fear of uh... i forgot. XD

anyway, i want to talk about my top fear.
As the coach pointed out, there are mainly 4 types of fear,
-Fear of failure
-Fear of the unknown
-Fear of rejection
-Fear of the future

There are two of the failures which I was pondering over in class.
The Fear of the unknown and Fear of rejection.
When you add them up, you can sum up 89.23456789087654321345% of my life.

Whats going on in my head is about fears nowadays, fears of the most trivial things, fears of the fears of others, fears of anything and everything in the sun. maybe not the sun, but, whatever. lol

Fear has been a major factor in making the wall in front of me even stronger, its like fear decided to add another layer of brick behind the wall so that i can't break the barrier and I did not know what made the barrier stronger just a few weeks ago. How retarded can I be!

I have been living in fear my whole mundane teenage life and i do not know it. Shit man.

Anyway, chao, lets hope the course can shape me to know more about this yeah? =)

Words written on: March 7, 2009

Love is like the paper being sliced slowly but surely.

Anyway, i thought of 4 songs that really reminds me of myself.
The 4 songs are:
Please Don't Tell Her - Jason Mraz
You And Me - Lifehouse
True - Ryan Cabrera
Slide Away - Oasis

Well, i am in the mood do to some explaining =)
Soo i am gonna explain my interpretation of the song! =D

Please Don't Tell Her - Jason Mraz

hear she's kickin’ ass across the board and rock two
hundred thousand higher scorer
Just in time to save the world of being taken over.
She's a warrior
(This verse talks about "she" being excellent in the game she is playing. And this game she is playing is the game of love.)

I couldn't play again because the game it never ended. it never even landed on the can
And never let me in to spend my quarter.
(While playing the game of love with another person, the singer is never given the chance to play the game with her, hence, never let me in to spend my quarter.)

Say it isn't so
How she easily come, how she easy go
Please don't tell her that I've been meaning to miss her.
Because I don't.
(this is actually the singer telling himself that he does not love her anymore but he actually still loves her)

She was the girl with the broadest shoulders
But she would die before I crawled over them.
She is taller than I am.
She knew I wouldn't mind the view there
Or the altitude with a mouth full of air
She let me down and doubt came out until the now became later.
(Well, this part is kinda hard to transcript, but i think her maybe giving him a false hope but it was not going to work out in the predicament they are in.)

Say that it isn't so
How she easily come, how she easy go
Please don't tell her cause she don't really need to know.
(still the singer telling himself that he does not love her anymore)

That I'm crazy like the rest of us
And I'm crazier when I'm next to her.
(he is already mad about her, if he was to be next to her, it will be very tempting and he do not know whether he can handle the temptation)

So why after the all of everything that came and went
I care enough to still be singing of the bitter end and broken eras.
I told you I don't but
I am only trying to be the best with my intent to cure
The rest is sure to lay me ease the plural hurts of the words of reverse psychology
That's easier said
Easier than done
(This means that him telling himself he does not love her but actually does, and that hurts even more, thus easier said than done.)

Please don't dare tell her what I've become
Please don't mention all the attention I have drawn
Please don't bother cause she'll feel guilty when I'm gone
(he does not want the girl to feel he is the root of all the attention later on if she rejects him. Thus, he becomes heart broken and sick of love.)

Because I'm crazy like the rest of us
But I'm crazier when I'm next to her
And it's so amazing how she's so self-assured
But I know she'd hate me if she knew my words
(this means that she is confident about herself and that if he confessed, she will not bother about him.)

Do I hurt anymore
Do I hurt, well
I don't
I don't
I don't
(more convincing convincing convincing.)

You And Me - Lifehouse

What day is it? And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time
(this means that he has been wasting too much time and is indecisive of whether to tell the person he adores that he love her)

Cause it's you and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
(Among a million people, he only sees her.)

All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here
(him being nervous.)

Cause it's you and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right
(he don't know why he loves her, thus amounting everything to love)

Cause it's you and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
(Okie, let's not waste time!)

I'mma do the next two songs tmr!~

And, i finished reading "A fraction of a whole", a powerful novel with a different prospective. Now, i am gonna read "the white tiger" which beat "a fraction of a whole" to the Man Booker Prize.

Words written on: March 1, 2009

Slide away, and give it all you've got
My today, fell in from the top
I dream of you, and all the things you say
I wonder where you are now?

Hold me down, cause all the world's asleep
I need you now, you've got me on my knees,
I dream of you, we talk of growing old
But you said please don't...

Slide in baby, together we'll fly
I've tried praying, but I don't know what you're saying to me

Now that you're mine
We'll find a way
Of chasing the sun
Let me be the one, that shines with you
in the morning, I don't know what to do
we're two of a kind
We'll find a way
To do what we've done
Let me be the one, that shines with you
And we can slide away, slide away, slide away, away...

Slide away, and give it all you've got
My today, fell in from the top
I dream of you, and all the things you say
I wonder where you are now?

Slide in baby, together we'll fly
I've tried praying, and I know just what you're saying to me

Now that you're mine
We'll find a way
Of chasing the sun
Let me be the one that shines with you
in the morning when you don't know what to do
We're two of a kind
We'll find a way
To do what we've done
Oh, let me be the one
That shines with you, and we can slide away...

Oasis - Slide Away

Words written on: February 28, 2009

Hey guys, today was fun, tiring, and we did community work. haha
Well, had a little idea of meeting at mcd to makan before we went to school =D

haha anyway, the collection was a success and at the same time kinda fuuun! haha
After that, went Marina Square, ate too fast and was queezy after that. My stomach was churning like mad and I didn't feel so good..

Went for tuition after that.
Hours outside 12hours T_T

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I still cannot sum out enough courage..